Yesterday, husband and I were talking about the adoption that doesn't seem to be happening. I told him that I was concerned that it would take so long to get children, that we would get orders to move and then have to start the process all over again in another state.
Do you know what he said? He said that at this point he was content that we had been obedient and that even if we never got children, it was okay with him. He is happy with the three we have.
I agree with being content in our obedience, I agree with being happy with the three we have, but WHAT? I wasn't a fan of this process in the beginning. This was all his idea. Now, my heart longs to add more to our family and suddenly he's okay if it doesn't happen. WHAT??
Okay...deep breath. I explained to husband that a mother heart and a father heart are different. I explained that once a mother heart is set on having a child, you can't just turn it off. This monthly process that we are in is like trying to get pregnant every month.
He agreed, but stuck with his "logical" answer: "Even if we never get more children, we have done what we were supposed to do. What if God is simply asking us to be willing?"
Okay. He's right. But I'm still praying...
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2 comments:
sister, I am still praying too. I am sure that on some of the harder days at times you wouldn't expect; that logical side of your husband's heart will bring you unexpected peace.
I continue to believe that God has great plans for your family! Always.
I know this has to be frustrating -- thought of you at the library the other week. They had photos up of all the kiddos in KS waiting for adoption (many sibling groups). Praying for you and Eric, Logan, Ben and Miss Katie!
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